Yep...I hear you loud and clear...the heat, the cold seems to become more intimidating as time goes on....grrrr....and yes, I too have family and friends in northern Cal and Washington State....and yes again on melancholy, it is a very old friend of mine. I have learned (and continue to learn) to accept it when it visits, but not to cling to it, otherwise it can quickly turn into self-pity. Indeed it is a feeling and just like thoughts they are always passing through. It seems to always hold a question for me as to why I feel that way and, what is the deeper meaning, and then as I begin to understand, I take a deep breath and seek out feelings of gratitude and connectedness to all....we are not alone that is for sure. Not easy, but doable. Keep smiling...
Shanna, you are truly becoming Portuguese! What you are experiencing is saudade that Melancholy longing that is expressed in Fado. "Saudade is a word for a sad state of intense longing for someone or something that is absent. Saudade comes from Portuguese culture, and it is often expressed in its literature and music. Saudade is described as a kind of melancholy yearning." I have been in a state of angst since January, knowing that life in the United States no longer is tolerable for us. I have attempted 7 times to obtain legible fingerprints for my FBI background check, always rejected. Praises be, two weeks ago I obtained a Live Scan which was accepted. Hopefully we will be heading back to Portugal in December. Now the current dilemma is where to settle? We love a small big city with terrific transportation and Porto fits the bill. Except that we don't like cold and rain. 😒 I fell in love with Loule in the Algarve but transportation is inadequate and there are so many expats in that area that I am afraid we would get sucked up into a lifestyle that might preclude having Portuguese friends and acquaintances. 😐 My man, Victor, has been trying to talk me into Lisbon. Yes, like every place else I have seen in Portugal, I loved Lisbon. But with a population of more than 2 million, I was feeling overwhelmed by the thought of learning a new place of that size. Victor suggested Setubal and I remembered that it was one of the places you have lived. So I was up until 1 a.m. last night checking out rentals. I think that might very well work for us. Since you have lived in, if I remember correctly, three different neighborhoods, we would love to know what your take is on where you have located yourself. Come December, we will invite you for a coffee for sure and maybe even throw in a pastry, haha. Looking forward to meeting you, Jeanne and Victor
I think we're all feeling a bit down, or melancholy, with everything going on, the obstacles, tragedies, disappointments, etc. I try to sit with it and let it be. The past 6 1/2 months have been an exercise in acceptance, patience, and hope.
I have been catching up on your posts. This resonates with me so much. Melancholy is not depression, it's reflection. As I sit at home, windows open in a chilly October downpour in the southern US, I feel that edge of melancholy hovering just out of sight. It's a day, a week, a month, definitely a year, for melancholy. And yes, Shanna, you are perfectly entitled to feeling melancholy, even from your enviable home in Portugal! I so appreciate your self-reflections!
Yep...I hear you loud and clear...the heat, the cold seems to become more intimidating as time goes on....grrrr....and yes, I too have family and friends in northern Cal and Washington State....and yes again on melancholy, it is a very old friend of mine. I have learned (and continue to learn) to accept it when it visits, but not to cling to it, otherwise it can quickly turn into self-pity. Indeed it is a feeling and just like thoughts they are always passing through. It seems to always hold a question for me as to why I feel that way and, what is the deeper meaning, and then as I begin to understand, I take a deep breath and seek out feelings of gratitude and connectedness to all....we are not alone that is for sure. Not easy, but doable. Keep smiling...
I hear you! Ok to let ourselves feel the lows from time to time. Change will come!
You might enjoy listening to the Goldberg Variations.
Shanna, you are truly becoming Portuguese! What you are experiencing is saudade that Melancholy longing that is expressed in Fado. "Saudade is a word for a sad state of intense longing for someone or something that is absent. Saudade comes from Portuguese culture, and it is often expressed in its literature and music. Saudade is described as a kind of melancholy yearning." I have been in a state of angst since January, knowing that life in the United States no longer is tolerable for us. I have attempted 7 times to obtain legible fingerprints for my FBI background check, always rejected. Praises be, two weeks ago I obtained a Live Scan which was accepted. Hopefully we will be heading back to Portugal in December. Now the current dilemma is where to settle? We love a small big city with terrific transportation and Porto fits the bill. Except that we don't like cold and rain. 😒 I fell in love with Loule in the Algarve but transportation is inadequate and there are so many expats in that area that I am afraid we would get sucked up into a lifestyle that might preclude having Portuguese friends and acquaintances. 😐 My man, Victor, has been trying to talk me into Lisbon. Yes, like every place else I have seen in Portugal, I loved Lisbon. But with a population of more than 2 million, I was feeling overwhelmed by the thought of learning a new place of that size. Victor suggested Setubal and I remembered that it was one of the places you have lived. So I was up until 1 a.m. last night checking out rentals. I think that might very well work for us. Since you have lived in, if I remember correctly, three different neighborhoods, we would love to know what your take is on where you have located yourself. Come December, we will invite you for a coffee for sure and maybe even throw in a pastry, haha. Looking forward to meeting you, Jeanne and Victor
I think we're all feeling a bit down, or melancholy, with everything going on, the obstacles, tragedies, disappointments, etc. I try to sit with it and let it be. The past 6 1/2 months have been an exercise in acceptance, patience, and hope.
I have been catching up on your posts. This resonates with me so much. Melancholy is not depression, it's reflection. As I sit at home, windows open in a chilly October downpour in the southern US, I feel that edge of melancholy hovering just out of sight. It's a day, a week, a month, definitely a year, for melancholy. And yes, Shanna, you are perfectly entitled to feeling melancholy, even from your enviable home in Portugal! I so appreciate your self-reflections!