The unrelenting pressure to "BUY! BE HAPPY! " and the cynical sentimentality of the holiday season here in the US has driven us into outright hatred of this time. We buy small things for the immediate family, but a tree? Cookies? Bah, humbug. Our only Xmas tradition is going to a Chinese buffet for dinner so everyone can eat what they want, and I don't have the stress of cooking. 😝
Introvert disguised as extrovert to survive my business relationships. I too like being home. I send gift cards to the little ones so they don’t think I’m a Scrooge. I like watching old classic movies on x-mass day. The pandemic has helped to be anti social or non-social. I get tired of stupid filler conversations. I speak to people I haven’t spoken to all year and quickly remember why I hadn’t. Can’t wait to migrate to Portugal where the English I hear is in my head wondering if they are talking about me. Have a wonderful time being you at home with Milo and if we ever meet it will be because we want to not because we have to. Flip
Thank you for this beautifully written piece. It matches my feelings about the holiday season. i have worked with people for many years and have seen the madness and stress that these holidays put on people. The inability, often, to meet expectations from oneself and from others. Peace to all. May you be blessed this holiday season.
Lol! Hear, hear Shana. I am firmly in the bah-humbug camp. After harping for dollars for many years, if I never hear another X-mas carol again it will be too soon. We stopped giving gifts many moons ago. You are right, who needs the pressure?! I so do not miss the crazed feeling and obnoxiously pervasive X-mas spirit in the states. It is much more subdued here and I love that. I also love the roasted chestnuts! Merry, merry and a happy happy to you! ;)
Total agreement that holidays have too often become distorted, materialistic tools of social conformity that can leave many of us feeling isolated or guilty as we emotionally watch from the outside. I often struggled with that (as well as the imagery of communion that you describe, LOL!) growing up in a family that struggled to live up to middle class American standards of Christmas that left more feelings of stress than joy. But fortunately later in life I've been able to experience (largely through my wife's family) holiday celebrations more based on shared love and human connections. Travel has also helped me to see the positive sides of traditions that bond communities together. I think that may explain some of the simple beauties that you describe and that I hope to soon see in Portugal. Unfortunately in more "developed" countries we have allowed holidays to become market-driven perversions. I'd argue that it is an exploitation of our hyper-individualistic tendencies that allows us to value materialism over traditional connections to our neighbors. While I agree no one should be guilted into being part of any holiday, I also would find a world without them a bit sad. But I go on too long. Thanks for your thought-provoking post!
I also remember childhood Christmases fondly, I got to see my favorite aunt and liked to sit in the dark and squint at the lighted tree. I used to out on frosty CHRISTMAS EVE nights to see if I could see the star in the east. Which, where I lived, would have led the three wise men directly into the sea! Never mind, now, like you, I dislike all the preparation, the excess, and yes, the gift giving and stuff—unless the gift is handmade and if not made by me, it benefits someone else and is edible or otherwise consumable. I appreciate that the season gives some people joy—I’m just glad the light will be coming back, the days lengthened. Joy to you, and all your readers, regardless of the season!
I love and relate to "....drunk relatives exchanging passive-aggressive barbs....". OH the memories. I shall spend my first solo Christmas post-divorce happily not partaking in the aforementioned. thank you for your musings Shanna.
I’m with you. I’m an extrovert, but agree that Christmas has turned into commercial event with unrealistic expectations for those who participate. Good on those who appreciate and enjoy them, but I’ll be happy at home drinking an eggnog with my cat. Happy holidays one and all.
Yes! Doing it differently this year away from home in campervan and catching up with the children when everyone has more time. Thanks for a great post!
Hi Shanna, we do feel obliged to try and be festive and deliriously happy and friendly at this time of year!! My mum never feels festive, as this time of year is when my sister died of Cystic Fibrosis, I was only young myself, my sister was only 2 or 3 and I only have small recollections of her. Mum herself has a scan tomorrow morning as there is a problem with her liver! So if it's bad news, I dare say future Christmases won't be very festive for me! Anyway, it's still a time to reflect and unfortuneatly, yet another one with Covid and all it's variants!! Hopefully we can all look forward to 2022 with a new optimism and try and forget 2020 and 2021! let's hope so!! Hugs xxx
The unrelenting pressure to "BUY! BE HAPPY! " and the cynical sentimentality of the holiday season here in the US has driven us into outright hatred of this time. We buy small things for the immediate family, but a tree? Cookies? Bah, humbug. Our only Xmas tradition is going to a Chinese buffet for dinner so everyone can eat what they want, and I don't have the stress of cooking. 😝
Introvert disguised as extrovert to survive my business relationships. I too like being home. I send gift cards to the little ones so they don’t think I’m a Scrooge. I like watching old classic movies on x-mass day. The pandemic has helped to be anti social or non-social. I get tired of stupid filler conversations. I speak to people I haven’t spoken to all year and quickly remember why I hadn’t. Can’t wait to migrate to Portugal where the English I hear is in my head wondering if they are talking about me. Have a wonderful time being you at home with Milo and if we ever meet it will be because we want to not because we have to. Flip
Thank you for this beautifully written piece. It matches my feelings about the holiday season. i have worked with people for many years and have seen the madness and stress that these holidays put on people. The inability, often, to meet expectations from oneself and from others. Peace to all. May you be blessed this holiday season.
Lol! Hear, hear Shana. I am firmly in the bah-humbug camp. After harping for dollars for many years, if I never hear another X-mas carol again it will be too soon. We stopped giving gifts many moons ago. You are right, who needs the pressure?! I so do not miss the crazed feeling and obnoxiously pervasive X-mas spirit in the states. It is much more subdued here and I love that. I also love the roasted chestnuts! Merry, merry and a happy happy to you! ;)
Total agreement that holidays have too often become distorted, materialistic tools of social conformity that can leave many of us feeling isolated or guilty as we emotionally watch from the outside. I often struggled with that (as well as the imagery of communion that you describe, LOL!) growing up in a family that struggled to live up to middle class American standards of Christmas that left more feelings of stress than joy. But fortunately later in life I've been able to experience (largely through my wife's family) holiday celebrations more based on shared love and human connections. Travel has also helped me to see the positive sides of traditions that bond communities together. I think that may explain some of the simple beauties that you describe and that I hope to soon see in Portugal. Unfortunately in more "developed" countries we have allowed holidays to become market-driven perversions. I'd argue that it is an exploitation of our hyper-individualistic tendencies that allows us to value materialism over traditional connections to our neighbors. While I agree no one should be guilted into being part of any holiday, I also would find a world without them a bit sad. But I go on too long. Thanks for your thought-provoking post!
I also remember childhood Christmases fondly, I got to see my favorite aunt and liked to sit in the dark and squint at the lighted tree. I used to out on frosty CHRISTMAS EVE nights to see if I could see the star in the east. Which, where I lived, would have led the three wise men directly into the sea! Never mind, now, like you, I dislike all the preparation, the excess, and yes, the gift giving and stuff—unless the gift is handmade and if not made by me, it benefits someone else and is edible or otherwise consumable. I appreciate that the season gives some people joy—I’m just glad the light will be coming back, the days lengthened. Joy to you, and all your readers, regardless of the season!
I love and relate to "....drunk relatives exchanging passive-aggressive barbs....". OH the memories. I shall spend my first solo Christmas post-divorce happily not partaking in the aforementioned. thank you for your musings Shanna.
I’m with you. I’m an extrovert, but agree that Christmas has turned into commercial event with unrealistic expectations for those who participate. Good on those who appreciate and enjoy them, but I’ll be happy at home drinking an eggnog with my cat. Happy holidays one and all.
Yes! Doing it differently this year away from home in campervan and catching up with the children when everyone has more time. Thanks for a great post!
Hi Shanna, we do feel obliged to try and be festive and deliriously happy and friendly at this time of year!! My mum never feels festive, as this time of year is when my sister died of Cystic Fibrosis, I was only young myself, my sister was only 2 or 3 and I only have small recollections of her. Mum herself has a scan tomorrow morning as there is a problem with her liver! So if it's bad news, I dare say future Christmases won't be very festive for me! Anyway, it's still a time to reflect and unfortuneatly, yet another one with Covid and all it's variants!! Hopefully we can all look forward to 2022 with a new optimism and try and forget 2020 and 2021! let's hope so!! Hugs xxx