It's Okay if Isolation Isn’t Awful

I don't mind staying home, do you?

July is here, ushering in the second half of 2020—a year spent thus far in various stages of lockdown/quarantine/self-isolation. 

How are you handling it?

Do you live alone and feel anxious about not having more human contact? Or maybe you've said damn the virus while you enjoy loads of in-person connection. If so, how's that? Do you live with another person—or perhaps a houseful, and if so, do you think that makes being cooped up better—or worse?

My regular readers know I live alone, and I enjoy spending time solo. Although when most people meet me, they think I'm an extrovert because I'm relatively outgoing. I'm not shy, but I recharge by being alone, and I feel my best when I am by myself or with just one or two other close friends. I guess I'm what I'd call a gregarious introvert.

In the last issue, I wrote about Quaranteams and how we need to find ways to connect with others in these perilous times. Since it looks like we’ll be in the COVID-19 fog for a few years, we'd best get skilled at balancing risk and safety. Life is always a balancing act between these opposites, the tension of which makes life rewarding. Still, the risks feel especially exponential right now. 

As we learn to navigate life with a deadly virus lurking about, I want you to know that it's okay. It's okay if being isolated hasn't been that difficult for you. It hasn't been that tough for me. It's also okay if this has been hard for you. I'd guess for most people it’s been excruciating. I’ve had some pretty miserable days, yet, on the whole, I feel less anxious than when I'd internalize societal pressure about not wanting to go out before COVID-19. It’s nice not making excuses about wanting to stay home.

Marketing Makes me Nervous

When I see photos on billboards of people gathered and ostensibly having fun, I feel dismayed that these people are just too damn close to one another. I want to shout, "Why aren't you fools wearing masks?!" But I don't—I haven't yet reached the point where I scream at advertising. At least not out loud. 

Overall, I'm more peaceful, except when I think about the world opening up in any way similar to what it was before. The previous world scares me; I also mourn the loss of parts of it. I wanted to go back to the States and see my family in May, but that didn’t happen. I want to see my friends T & L and give them big hugs, but they're in Lisbon, and that might as well be outer Mongolia. 

Fear about the virus and uncertainty about the economy is overwhelming. Being overwhelmed is exhausting. It’s okay to take this enforced isolation as a time for necessary and nourishing rest. No excuses needed.

If you're embarrassed to admit that staying in has been mostly okay, that's just fine. You don’t have to hide it because others are vocal about how awful it is (for them). In the world before the Virus, there was so much pressure to go out and do things! To have FUN! To accomplish and be busy and produce!

That world was exhausting, and I think we all needed a break, just not in the form of a global pandemic.

GOOD STUFF:

• What Americans Need to Know About Europe’s Travel Ban

• The Science of Well-Being. A free course offered by Yale on the Coursera platform (I just signed up). It’s Yale’s most popular class.

• I’m a doctor. Here’s how I talk to my patients about COVID-19 conspiracies by Yoo Jung Kim.

  I’ve learned that conspiracy theorists are often neither malevolent nor unintelligent. Rather, many are afraid of their own powerlessness, and these theories offer them a semblance of control. Believing that COVID-19 was perpetuated by organizations with evil intentions allows conspiracy theorists to affix their anxiety onto a big, bad villain, rather than acknowledge our collective powerlessness against the whims of nature.

  —> If you enjoy my writing and want to show a bit of appreciation, you can buy me a coffee (I love coffee). Thank you—and thanks to those who have already done so!